Apriana Vinasyiam, PhD at aquaculture and fisheries group, from Indonesia
I got engaged in Indonesia, about two months before I started my PhD here in Wageningen. Since it is custom to get married within a year of engagement, I will get married in April and have a long distance marriage.
I think the most important benefit of marriage is having visions together with someone else: especially about our family life goal which can help to shape and direct my future decisions. Being married also means I will have to spare time to take care for my husband. It can indeed decrease the time I have for work, but I see from the positive side that it also possibly can balance my work and personal life better. I am also looking forward to the motivation and support marriage will give me. My fiancé already supports me a lot with my PhD. I know there will be hard times during my PhD, and knowing that I don’t do it just for me but that he also counts on me to succeed, gives me a lot of power.
Marriage is really important in my culture. It is the only way to be recognized as a couple, both by the government and by society. The wedding itself will be a quite big celebration, with over 600 people coming, which is common in Indonesia. The bride and groom have to stand a day long to receive the guest one by one. The event will take place in my parent’s place, Selayar, a very beautiful small island.
We both want to work in Indonesia later, and my fiancé is now looking for a PhD here. Until that time, we have to deal with the distance and time difference, which is hard. I am thankful for the technology we have today. It really has impact on maintaining our communication and love over a distance of almost 12.000 kilometer.
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